What Is Your Payoff?

Here’s a point that might give you pause. Certainly, it has a pro and a con aspect. However, it’s the “con” aspect that really gives the pause that gives you pause.

Every behavior has a payoff.

This is obvious if you think about it. It means that we do something to get something.

Easy enough to understand, is it not?

This echoes a truth about human nature. We do everything we do to generate a feeling. When you understand this, you can understand humans (including the one you see in the mirror) much better.

Here’s the point that might give you pause. And it’s a pause that costs you money.

Consider an all-too-common behavior like procrastination. If “every behavior has a payoff” is true, this must also be true for procrastination as well.

So what possible payoff can a self-defeating behavior like procrastination deliver and how is that at all desirable?

The answer lies in a fear of success and an acclimation to the feeling of failure. Arguably, these are not desirable even if they are familiar.

And we human beings choose the familiar over the unfamiliar all too often. This is true even when the unfamiliar is the far more beneficial choice.

When you procrastinate, you avoid success. And if you suspect that success and the money it brings with it have undesirable consequences and unwanted responsibilities, procrastination is an acceptable behavior.

If offers a payoff that is safe and familiar, that is, no success and no money.

And if the feeling of failure is familiar and you have accepted this as the norm in your world, can you see how this makes procrastination even more “acceptable?”

And you can always say “I didn’t have time” or “I just didn’t get around to it.”

This is not the way of success. However, it is the way of failure.

So what’s your payoff? Which side of the coin is “familiar” to you?

If it is the coin of success, you either have a lot of coins or will soon. And that’s a desirable payoff.

This Has Not Changed Much

You’ve heard this before. Did you realize how true it is?

The more we change, the more we stay the same. Here’s an interesting illustration.

People have sought surplus resources for as long as there have been people. And this has always symbolized status and social standing.

Researchers have uncovered evidence from the end of the last Ice Age (11,000 years ago) that our ancient forebears feasted on lavish meals. At least, they were lavish by the standards of the day.

They know this because they have found evidence of chili peppers. These have little nutritional value, yet were gathered and some suspect even cultivated for their flavor.

Scientists suggest that they were used in feasts intended to form alliances with neighboring clans and/or secure mates. In any case, they were part of the prehistoric version of “lifestyles of the rich and famous.”

I expect that that the same thoughts and feelings were at play in that day as in this. The drive to better one’s lot in life, even before money as we know it, was just as powerful when the glaciers melted as in the day of documentaries about melting glaciers.

No doubt, the feeling of satisfaction and accomplishment at having thrown such a party is essentially the same. And so is the sense of having accomplished one’s objective such as trade, alliance, or a mate.

Even though such an event may have been more of a community effort than it might be today, some leader must have thought up the plan, inspired people, and managed the project to completion. The good vibes that come with accomplishment and all that surplus resources bring with it must have felt just as empowering then as it does today.

So here’s the lesson. You are the modern-day version of achievers dating back to time immemorial. Like many, many before you, the emotional zing of success and money (even if it is measured in chili pepper feasts) is as alive and well as it’s ever been.

Why is this? The more we change, the more we stay the same.

So, the Ice Age notwithstanding, it’s safe to say that not much has changed, is it not?

You Can Deal with This

When I talk about a fear of success, some people look at me like I’m crazy. They ask “Why would you fear success? Isn’t that what you want?”

Of course, success is what you want. It’s what we all want.

However, here’s what I’ve observed about the person who asks this question. He or she does not have short-circuits about the unintended consequences of success and money.

This means that the implications of success and money do not faze this person. He or she anticipates being able to successfully deal with whatever happens.

Here’s an example. I was talking about my profession to someone.

He mentioned that he wouldn’t even want to win the lottery because all his family members would ask for money. And then he said how money causes problems “like that.”

I asked “What does ‘like that?’ mean? And who gives pieces of paper we call ‘money’ the power to cause interpersonal discord?”

I explained that the issues are with the people, not the money. And if the people don’t resolve the issues, it just lies dormant until some situation, financial or otherwise, triggers the issue.

So can you imagine that if this person had drive and ambition, the thought of dealing with relatives over his new-found wealth would be a less-than-energizing influence?

This is precisely why someone might harbor a fear of success and money. Rather than say “I will deal with it at the time,” he or she might let this fester into a mental and emotional short-circuit.

This will distract you from giving full and total focus to your money-making activity. It will interfere despite your best efforts to give full and unbridled attention to the deal, prospect, or project at hand.

And it will cause you to hesitate, stumble, and hold back when others make bold plans, charge ahead, and bring their full attention and complete focus to making money.

If this is an issue, you can deal with it. Make the money and take your chances. You should have lots of problems like this, wouldn’t you agree?

A Reality of Business

Here’s a reality of business.

I once worked for a man who said “Nothing is forever.” How true.

Nothing is forever. Stated another way, whatever it is, it won’t last.

Whatever you are going through right now, it will end. This means that every good time, bad time, or indifferent time will come to a conclusion.

And it will be replaced by something else. In turn, this will be replaced by something else that may or not be related to what preceded it.

And this means that no matter what is happening, it will pass and be replaced by something different.

In a large or small business, nothing is forever. Trends emerge, loom large, and then fade. Technology renders lots and lots of things, ways of doing business, and even ways of life obsolete at breakneck speed.

Change is the one constant in which we can rely. At the very least, this means “make hay while the sun shines” or “any port in a storm.”

However, for our purposes, it means to invest in that which transcends change. By this I mean that which lies in your mind and heart.

Confidence is confidence is confidence regardless of the vagaries of your business at any time. And since confidence and money are essentially two ends of the same stick, as long as your confidence is intact, your money won’t be far behind, circumstances notwithstanding.

The attitude of service and the desire to add value are intangibles of your inner world that have nothing to do with the economic headlines, be they good, bad, or indifferent.

A shining Money Self-Image makes it possible to take advantage of any situation whether it looks promising or not. It empowers you to go twice as far in half the time when conditions are favorable. It also sharpens your vision to find the vein of silver in what others see as dark storm clouds.

So here’s a paradox. Despite conditions which always change, you can come out on top by relying on that which does not change.

And this makes you a high earner. And this is the reality of business. Your business.

Seeing is What?

You have heard “seeing is believing.” I would ask “Seeing is what? or “To what kind of seeing do you refer?”

Here’s why. Unless and until you see “it” in your mind’s eye, you won’t see “it” in your everyday reality.

And it doesn’t matter what “it” is. This can be anything that you can see, hear, touch, smell, or taste.

I know you have probably heard this a time or two. This wisdom is as ancient as ancient gets. It’s been around for as long as there have been people.

And sometimes that’s the reason we need to hear it so many times. It’s so much a part of how our minds work that we easily forget it. And we do so at great cost in terms of success and money.

So when someone one says “Seeing is believing,” recognize that this person is essentially clueless about how the mind works. And this is equally true when someone says the sister statement “I’ll believe it when I see it.”

Quite the opposite happens. You see it in your mind’s eye, then you begin to believe it with a greater and greater intensity, and then you see it in everyday reality.

So let your imagination envision some desirable outcome in your mind’s eye. Add color, brightness, clarity, and motion. This will make your image a very compelling experience.

And as you continue to let yourself connect with this image on an emotional level, you can believe in something even though you do not see it physically.

This is the kind of seeing that makes believing and subsequent success possible. This is so because the mind works this way.

And how very fortunate that this is so! Here’s why.

If you could only believe what you physically see, you could never get any farther ahead in life that what’s in front of you. If this was so, I imagine we would still be in caves.

So see with your mind’s eye. The success and money you desire will be along presently.

They Think We’re Nuts

People try all kinds of ways to talk you and I out of money. Including thinking we are a little nuts.

From time to time, I notice a study by psychologists that attempt to explain why some people want to make more money than they really need. I noted one commentator who wrote this:

“Why does a person who is already rolling in money want more? Indeed, why do people whose lives are already comfortable make sacrifices in other areas of their lives – family, friendships and their own sanity – just to get more cash? Especially when, objectively, they appear to be dollars that they don’t need.”

The main thesis of this article is that money is a drug and the accumulation of lots of money is an addiction. The author even says, “Money turns out to be one of the most addictive games we ever invented.”

Here’s how I respond. While this is possible, it’s more likely that some people just don’t get it.

And this is true even if they have advanced degrees. Arguably, the advanced degrees are the reason they just don’t get it!

In any case, if you want a justification for feeling uncomfortable about wanting money or a plausible reason for talking yourself out of mega-success, I commend this thinking to you. It will make you doubt the wisdom of high aspirations in business and question the wisdom of having a pile of money.

And this much I promise you. Listen to this kind of thinking long enough and let these thoughts resonate long enough and you will believe them.

And it won’t matter how long you entertained energizing thoughts about success and money up to that point. It’s what happens when you let less-than-empowering thoughts screw up your thinking.

Let this happen at your own peril. There are enough people who will try to talk you out of success without relying on degreed people who don’t get it.

Money means a lot things to us. Let it mean “challenge” and you can get as much as you want.

It Defies Meaning

You can define money. However, you can’t really define what it means to you.

In simplest terms, money is pieces of paper with pictures of dignitaries on them. People exchange these pieces of paper (physically or electronically) for products or services.

So money is a “medium of exchange.” When you have enough of it, you can exchange it for virtually anything you want.

Without it, life is full of hassles. And so much of your mental and emotional energy revolves around how to get by and last longer with less.

However, with enough money, life is full of options, alternatives, and possibilities. You can pick and choose and design your life according to your own personal blueprint.

And even though “the best things in life are free,” everything else costs money. And this is why money holds the special place in your life that it does.

Money can mean many things because it buys so many things that have meaning. It can buy flowers and candy or fund a divorce settlement. The money is the same. However, the resonance is very, very different.

At different times and under different circumstances, money can mean status, success, power, security, accomplishment, and more depending on the situation. And it can mean control over circumstances and a sense of freedom that only money can bring.

It can also mean anxiety, tension, stress, and fear. Money worries can be a worry unlike any other worry because it touches just about every area of life.

And a lot of these meanings likely have their roots in your earliest memories about money. Let your mind go back to what you heard about and felt about money in your earliest years. You will have a much clearer idea of about how you define the meanings of money in your life.

So realize that money has lots of meanings. And you get to define these meanings, so assign good meanings to money.

The dollars in your pocket will resonate with the highest and best in your money experience.

Your Acceptance Speech

Here’s a principle that can make you a lot of money. Act the part and you become the part.

This implies another truth about success and accomplishment. If you practice anything long enough, you can master it.

And this includes making money. And here is good news if you’ve never made a great deal of money before.

Even if you have never achieved a great success or made a lot of money, you can still practice accepting yourself as a prosperous and successful person. As you continue to do this, you refine and revamp your money self-image along new and Money-Mind expanding ways.

So here is how to apply this to making money.

Practice your acceptance speech when you accept the piles of money that you imagine life offers you. Rehearse what you will say when opportunity presents itself, people offer help, and you get “the breaks” that you might not have ever gotten before.

Imagine what words will form on their own when the door of opportunity opens. Hear what you will say as you find all the money you want and need on the other side.

What will you see when that door opens? What will you look like and act like?

Will you sound surprised? Will you sound grateful? Will you sound as if you expected it?

Will you dance, jump, or punch that air with your fist? What will you do?

As you’ve seen actors and actresses accepting awards, will you thank anyone? Will you make a statement about something? Will you just take the goodies, wave, and run?

Whatever reaction seems right to you, do it, and do it with gusto. Put some feeling into it.

This is important because you are impressing your unconscious mind with a new and improved version of you. Do this enough and you will experience in real time what you’ve been practicing in imagination.

So use your imagination to act the part of success and you will become the success you envision. Practice this long enough and you will have the money to show you have mastered it.

It’s Complex Stuff

Money is pretty complex stuff. This is because it is so intertwined with our lives that it makes its presence felt in many different ways and under virtually all circumstances.

That is because you can’t do much without it. You deal with its presence or its absence every day.

You factor the amount of money you have or do not have in many everyday decisions you make. Can you do this now or later? Can you buy this today or do you have to put it off?

In many ways, the size of your exchequer sets the agenda and defines the options that are available to you. Can you afford the deluxe version or do you have to settle for the basic, stripped-down version?

At least in part, the decision comes down to money.

Because of all that this implies, the amount of money you have impacts your self-esteem, self-worth, and self-image. And this may weigh heavily on how you feel about yourself.

The foregoing is true even for the most well-adjusted among us. Unless you are an ascetic, you can’t help but feel elated when you can afford the best. And you can’t help but feel frustrated when you have to a settle for less than what you want.

So money weaves a complex web in your life. Like it or not, its presence resonates through your mind and heart in many, many ways.

That’s why you need a bunch of it. And that’s why you can’t be shy about wanting a pile of it.

If you don’t have all the money you want, a failure to make peace with this need may be the very internal attitude that keeps money from you. Here’s what I mean.

Although you may not like the role money plays in your life, its presence is undeniable. So make your peace with this and set out to have a bunch.

It’s pretty complex stuff. However, a bunch of it makes life a whole lot simpler.

This Sweet Feeling

I am a fan of success and making money. And I’m an avid exponent of achieving this by any and all means that are not illegal, immoral, or fattening.

Well, two out three in any case.

And vindication is a wonderful fuel with which to stoke your Money Mind. Here’s why.

You likely have a person or two in your world presently or from your past that did not exactly offer encouragement and support for your money-making activities. In fact, this person may have and/or may continue to be less than supportive and even berate you for your fortune-seeking activities.

This is the person who says “What makes you think you can do that?” and related nonsense. And this is the person that needs to see that he or she was wrong about you.

At least for you, this will be sweet vindication. So imagine this moment in your mind’s eye.

What will you see in the moment you realize that your faith in yourself was justified? What pictures will your eyes capture that will prove beyond a doubt that you had every reason to believe in yourself? And what tells you that you could do this thing that someone else thought you could not do?

What sounds will your ears hear in that moment that tell you that you were right about yourself and this person was wrong about you? And what thoughts go through your head and feelings go through your heart that tell you it was all worth it?

Of course, the person in question may not know or care about this moment of personal triumph in your life. He or she may well be just as unsupportive as ever.

Well, what of it? Your moment of vindication will resonate in your mind and heart regardless of the reaction of this unsupportive person.

Practice this moment in imagination. Soon enough, you will experience the real thing and have the money to go along with it.